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SLEEPING WITH MY EYES OPEN

By popular demand!     I slept with my eyes open. It was recently brought to my attention that I will be turning 66 this December. I can't tell you how that feels.  It's the strangest thing.  I don't feel 66.  I don't know what 66 is supposed to feel like.  I stopped thinking about my age at 64.  It's as if someone hit the pause button on time.  But, in real time I am about to turn 66. I've considered myself informed, well read, conscious and as living on purpose, not by coincidence. But, I have been in a coma.  Sleeping with my eyes open. I saw, I heard, I assessed and I considered. I judged, forgave, condemned, pardoned and adjusted, moved and swayed like a branch in the breeze trying to accommodate the un-functionality of soul without realizing that my soul was something apart from my body. I have been medicated to balance my bouncing mind.  It keeps me awake all night sometimes.  And when I do sleep, I dream I am do...
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ONE CAN GET STUFF WRONG!

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I am a little surprised that I can be so wrong.  Here's the thing, I thought I would know Denzel Washington's voice when I hear it.  I don't! I started watching The Rainmaker, again, because I can.  I can't remember the story or who acts in it, but I remember I loved it.   So I am busy reformatting the page here, and the movie begins, and I could have sworn it was Denzel Washington speaking. I smiled.  I do like him.  I can listen and carry on here, but then I click back to the movie.  It is not Denzel Washington.  Just goes to show how wrong one can be, and be quite sure about it too, Matt Damon, not Denzel Washington. Joke. Difference between a "lady" and a lawyer, the lady will stop "extortion" after you are dead. It's not funny, because it is not really true, and it is funny because even when you are dead you have to pay for stuff on earth and some in the afterlife.  "Death and taxes," Cause and effect. For your edificati...
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Depression 0005 ~ Monday or Pretoria

This is looking after me phase.  Unchartered territory. Survival strategies. Actions taken:- The specialist gave new medication - long term. Therapy ~ more meaningful than before. Perhaps because I am ready or desperate or I have found a good therapist or a combination of the three.) Actions to produce joy. 1. Knitting (I know! It sounds boring, but it is surprisingly comforting making things.) 2. Crocheting (Also not boring. Making up my own patterns. Progress good.) 3. Painting and drawing. (Spending more time drawing with some success. Practice does help.)  Exploring sculpting - early stages - starting with a seahorse I bought and am now going to finish off and make more durable and beautiful. 4. Writing. (Mostly notes from my studies of  The Zohar and reading other books) 5. Watching CNN. (Contradiction on the surface. However, it helps to know the state of collective consciousness.) 6. Planning holidays/trips. 6.1. Train journey to Durban to see thr...
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